Thursday, September 11, 2014

Raining In Love -Richard Brautigan

This is one of my all-time favorite poems!
It's Raining In Love - Richard Brautigan
I don't know what it is,
 but I distrust myself
 when I start to like a girl
 a lot.

 It makes me nervous.
 I don't say the right things
 or perhaps I start
 to examine,
 what I am saying.

 If I say, "Do you think it's going to rain?"
 and she says, "I don't know,"
 I start thinking : Does she really like me?

 In other words
 I get a little creepy.

 A friend of mine once said,
 "It's twenty times better to be friends
 with someone
 than it is to be in love with them."

 I think he's right and besides,
 it's raining somewhere, programming flowers
 and keeping snails happy.
 That's all taken care of.


 if a girl likes me a lot
 and starts getting real nervous
 and suddenly begins asking me funny questions
 and looks sad if I give the wrong answers
 and she says things like,
 "Do you think it's going to rain?"
 and I say, "It beats me,"
 and she says, "Oh,"
 and looks a little sad
 at the clear blue California sky,
 I think : Thank God, it's you, baby, this time
 instead of me.

I have been contemplating getting the following lines tattooed:

“Do you think it’s going to rain?”
“It beats me.”

I have never concerned myself with whether other people will understand my ink or not, but this is one poem that I think truly reflects how I grew up perceiving relationships. I used to be (and often still am) the person who is desperately trying to get the other person’s attention. Looking for the other person’s approval, and input, just any attempt at getting their attention. I have obviously learned that usually those are the people who end up being the least worthy of my attention, but it’s peculiar how we can so desperately rely on others for our self-satisfaction. This is something I struggle with every day, but being married to a wonderful man, he helps remind me every day that if I am happy with myself, then I am easily loveable and desirable, and he craves me deeply.    

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