First things first, let's start off with a brief glimpse into my past:
In elementary school I danced, rode motorcycles, sprinted, monky-ed on the monkey bars, played basketball, and volleyball. I was more acrobatic than most of my friends, taller than all of my friends, and I broke my wrist riding a motorcycle. I also noticed that my legs were bigger than a fellow dancer I always competed against, however I was a faster runner than all the boys.
In high school I continued playing both basketball and volleyball, and I got my first real job. I was slender, as we're most of my friends. I received multiple academic and athletic awards. I dated a couple boys, and pursued a long term relationship. I waitress-ed, quit basketball and I wasn't the best at anything.
While pursuing post secondary education, a lot happened. I gained weight. I broke up with my boyfriend. I dated. I pursued a long term relationship. I gained more weight. I lived with boys and moved multiple times. I had to put my cat down. I ate terribly. I was in love. I ran, joined a gym, quit the gym, and I lived apart from my boyfriend for several months.
I never had to worry much about my size/weight as a "kid" growing up, however, I always took note of it. I loved that for most of my adolescent years I was tall, slender, and relatively athletic. The older I became, the tougher it was to sustain any sort of physical fitness. I never used to have to "work" to maintain my body shape (which I took much pride in), but slowly yet surely that started to catch up with me which was a huge shock to my system. I noticed more and more that my clothes didn't fit as well, I was always having to buy a size or two larger than I expected. My confidence was crushed, and I couldn't handle it. So what did I do? Complained, and stuffed my face with more crappy food, and complained some more. I worried that my husband would lose interest in me, and feared the worst.
There was no one thing in particular that made me change, but eventually I realized that it was myself that I was disappointed in (there was no one else to blame no matter how much I tried), and that I needed to get control over that. My husband has always been my best supporter, loving me at every size and shape I have been, which made it that much more obvious to me that I needed to change for myself. It was me that was unhappy, not anyone else. I needed to see myself in a more positive light, and that meant, putting in some work. If Mark was willing to love me at my worst, I had to be willing to work to be my best.
My girlfriend/co-worker, Terri, introduced me to Fitness Blender. I've talked about it a million times on this blog, and that's because it has truly changed my life. She mentioned it to me one day while we were working, showed me a glimpse of a video, and I thought to myself: I can do those moves. The next day I loaded up the webpage, searched through the free online videos and took the plunge.
I have not looked back since. It was March 2015 when I did that first Fitness Blender video, and between March and June I did several videos a couple times a week. Although at that time in my personal life things were not the best (crummy work hours, etc.), my confidence was growing regardless. I was working out around 3 times a week and feeling stronger every day. Sadly, in June 2015 I had a small hiccough. I broke my foot during one of the workouts, and then re-broke it again a few weeks later in July. I sunk into a bit of a slump again, feeling embarrassed at all the lost progress, but thankfully, I kept reminding myself how energized I did feel while working out, and as soon as I got the "okay" that my foot was healed, I decided to plunge right back into those Fitness Blender videos.
I have been working out 5-7 days a week since October 2015. On any given day I do anything from running, HIIT, yoga, Pilates, strength training, cardio, etc., and of course, I still play volleyball a couple times a week. Honestly, it's the HIIT and strength training that has made the biggest impact on my life. I used to shy away from strength training, not because I thought I would get bulky (trust me, it's easily avoidable), but because I thought it was boring. Fitness Blender quickly taught me though, that done in the right sequence, strength training is fun, and probably the most effective at getting the kind of results I was looking for. My weight has dropped about 15-20lbs from my heaviest (2014), my body has never looked stronger (in my opinion), and the best advantage of all, I feel healthier. I look at my body on any given day, and I like what I see. Sure I still have flaws or "problem areas", but I am learning to love and embrace them, and see them more as projects instead of simply negatives.
I never thought I would be one of those people that just loves and craves working out. I've always loved sports and athleticism, but general working out never appealed to me, and now, it's literally a part of me. Whether you struggle with body weight issues, or just confidence in general, I highly recommend exercising regularly. It may sound cheesy, but to quote Legally Blonde, "endorphins make you happy, and happy people just don't shoot their husbands." My life has changed drastically over the years, but in the last 10 months I have learned a lot more about myself than probably my total lifetime so far. I feel like I have become an entirely different person. It feels kind of weird to say it out loud, but I kind of like myself a lot now. Don't get me wrong, I have a ton of major flaws, and I will always need some "work", but when I look in the mirror, I know I am a better person today than I was 20 years ago, 10 years ago, 5 years ago, last year, or even last week.
|My body changes from 2009 (my most "thin" at 130lbs) to 2014 (my heaviest and most unfit at 155lbs), to this year (my most fit, and feeling strong at 140lbs)|