Wednesday, December 3, 2014

This feeling...

I find myself feeling...feeling a

I don't know if it is because last weekend for four days straight I spent with five other people around, and basically outside all day, and then when I came back home, I spent an entire day inside and all by my self. Maybe it was a bit of a shock to the system to go from one extreme to the next, but something has me 

Now generally speaking I can get kind of overwhelmed when surrounded by to many people and too much commotion. So, it's normal for me to love spending my days solo, and I pretty much always get out of the house for an hour to walk the dog, but for some reason I still just feel off. I found myself lying in bed last night asking myself "In what direction do I want to head? Is everyone else happier than me? Does it matter?"

Should I travel? Should I continue education? Should I hunker down and get the debt paid off faster? Should I look into buying a house despite the debt? Should I re-decorate? What should I do with myself? Do I need to do anything with myself?

I am perfectly happy with my life, don't get me wrong, but should I be doing more, or less, would either make me happier? Do I need to be happier? 

Perhaps I just need a new project, or a goal to work towards, something to keep me distracted, but focused at the same time.  Something to either help this feeling pass, or something to help me steer into the feeling and plow right through it. 

I already feel better working on this blog, writing is freeing and feels like a weight off my shoulders. Working on this blog has also made me look into photography. Photography has always been something I enjoyed doing, but the more I take pictures I find the more I want to learn skills. I also did some scrapbooking this morning, and again that got some creative juices flowing. I've never really considered myself a creative person by any means. I've always been the plan, schedule, coordinate type person. Sometimes I find the creative stuff unsettling, but other times it's so relieving, it just depends what mood I am in.

I think this is something I am slowly learning about myself. I don't have to be just one type of person. I can be what ever type of person I feel I need to be on what ever day so that I feel happy in my skin. 

That is all for today. Sorry that today's post is a little scrambly, but I basically just let me hands take over. No filter. 

'Til next time, 


  1. Those are the best kind of posts! I know that feeling you describe very well. It's sort of an inner restlessness. As annoying as that is, I think that feeling is what propels us forward in life. It makes us grow, explore, and expand our horizons.
    You are not alone!

  2. You pegged it Miriam...restlessness...that is the exact feeling!